In the evening, he pushes the door open and enters.

The afterglow of the setting sun spills in through the floor-to-ceiling windows and falls on his face so beautifully that it seems unreal.

I can’t control myself, and take a few steps back. My eyes are fixed on him, and the hand holding my phone grips it so hard that my fingertips turn white.

“A-Zhen, did you miss me?” He removes his suit jacket skillfully and takes off his leather shoes to replace them with soft house shoes, which gives his whole person a somewhat languid atmosphere. “It’s more comfortable at home.”

I see him raise his hand to slightly mess up his hair, then loosely unbutton the cuffs and collar of his shirt.

The warm sunlight outlines his tall figure, and the white shirt tucked into his trousers depicts the slender and muscular contours of his body. He walks toward me on long legs, handsome and full of spirit, and I can even see a bit of relaxation and joy in his eyes.

Just like most men when coming home after leaving work.

But I can’t forget the obscure darkness outside the peephole.

I really try to convince myself that it was all a misunderstanding. Maybe the peephole was actually broken, and Mingcheng just so happened to get off work at this time. But when he hugs me and rubs the side of his face against my neck, I don’t hug him back. I say instead: “Is the fingerprint lock broken?”

He doesn’t pause in his affectionate movements. He kisses the side of my face tenderly and gives a slight frown, saying in an uncertain tone: “It’s probably broken.”

I don’t speak.

He seems to notice that something is strange about me, and sets his handbag behind the sofa. He pulls me out the door and closes it, then asks me to try to open it. “I think it’s strange too that it suddenly can’t be opened. You try it, I don’t know if the problem is just with me.”

His attitude is really calm. I hesitate, then press my hand on it.

“Warning, fingerprint unlock is disabled.”

He shakes his head as if he has a headache. “It seems the safety of this thing still needs some consideration. Let’s use keys for the time being.”

It is impossible to check who the problem is.

My heart sinks again.

He reopens the door and turns on the indoor lights. The crystal chandelier was chosen by Mingcheng when we got married, and it has a warm-colored light. At this moment, he stands indoors with a layer of radiance on his broad shoulders. Slender arms reach out toward me, palms spread upward in an elegant gesture of invitation, but I find myself feeling resistant.

It seems that every person has a sixth sense.

Mingcheng and I have known each other since we were very young. We grew up together and fell in love. I have never had negative emotions toward him since then. We’ve had our share of quarrels, but I just found it funny to see his sulking expression, and never had this sense of resistance against him. 

I don’t know why, but although his attitude and personality haven’t changed, I feel like he is a different person today.

I suddenly remember a saying: people are most sensitive to those closest to them.

“A-Zhen.” He calls to me with his eyes curved, “I’m very happy today. Let’s dance together after dinner.”

I have said before that Mingcheng is a very romantic person, and he also attaches great importance to rituals in life.

“Okay, ah.” I breathe a sigh of relief, put my hand in his palm, and raise my eyebrows at him with a smile. “Let’s eat Sichuan food tonight. You order it first, and I’ll prepare it.”

He is very happy when he hears this. With a pair of slightly narrowed eyes, he kisses my forehead and goes to order the food.

Once he leaves, I secretly look back at the peephole.

The lights in the courtyard have turned on in advance, and the setting sun is like blood. My white bird sits tiredly in its cage, and the neighbor’s dog is stretching on the balcony.

The peephole is intact.

And the food is wrong.

In fact, we rarely cook for ourselves at night. I have VIP status at many restaurants in the city, and Mingcheng knows which ones I like to eat at.

But by the time the food delivery person comes in, my heart is completely cold.

“Sir, it is our honor to serve you this food. It is your first time ordering from us, and our manager specifically asked for us to take care of you throughout the meal.” The delivery person’s eyes gleam when he looks at me.

Our wedding villa is in the most exclusive residential area in the city, so most of the restaurants that deliver food want me to apply as a super VIP. I don’t like dealing with overenthusiastic strangers, which is why I don’t like trying new stores.

After sending away the delivery person, I sit under the warm light, feeling chilled all over.

It is also at this time that I begin to have an ominous feeling in my heart.

The food on the table is hot and fragrant. The person opposite selects from the wine cabinet, running his fingers over the dark wine bottles. His skin is so smooth that it seems like it has no texture at all, and such perfection smacks of falsehood.

I look at him from head to toe and ask with some difficulty: “Mingcheng, what time did you get off work today?”

He tilts his head slightly, but his eyes remain on the wine bottles: “Five o’clock. What’s wrong?”

The corners of my mouth twitch. I rub the skin on the back of my left hand with my right one, and my nails make red marks on the skin. My voice is very heavy: “Is that so…..has work been going well at the company recently?”

At this moment, I have a little hope in my heart that it’s just because there is something wrong with the company. Mingcheng didn’t go to work, but didn’t want to burden me, so he stayed outside the door.

But he says: “It is going very smoothly. A-Zhen can rest his heart.”

I fall into silence, and he doesn’t speak anymore after saying this. He seems to have noticed that something is off about me, and the room is quiet for a long time.

Eventually, I give up.

It is truly torturous to feel that something is wrong with your lover.

Perhaps it is the scene of spurting blood during the day that had a serious impact on me. I really can’t forget what happened that day, the blood, the darkness outside the peephole, and the abnormal fingerprint lock.

I can’t take it anymore. Whether something is really wrong with him or I’m crazy, I feel like I need an answer.

I stand up, walk to him in a few steps, and put my hands on his shoulders under his doubtful gaze. I make him look directly at me and say in a serious tone: “Mingcheng, tell me, where did you go this afternoon? Why were you standing in the living room this morning instead of going to work?”

The more I think about it, the more I feel that something is wrong. At ten o’clock in the morning, he was standing in the center of the living room, neatly dressed. Had he just gotten ready, or had he been standing there since early in the morning? How long had he been standing there? And why?

Mingcheng sees my serious expression and stops smiling. “This morning…..I wanted to be at home with you. I did go to work in the afternoon.” He lowers his eyes to look at me. There is some hurt in his eyes, and his tone is certain. “A-Zhen, you doubt me.”

I admit frankly: “I think something is wrong with you.”

He asks: “What do you think is wrong with me?”

My reasoning tells me that I should hide some things for future observation, but when confronted with Mingcheng’s face that I’m around day and night, I really can’t help it. He seems to have some magical power that makes me pour out all of my feelings and confusion.

He looks at me silently and says nothing for a long time.

And when confronting the person closest to me, every moment of silence is piercing.

His silence abruptly undermines my confidence. 

“Tomorrow…..” he says. “No, right now. I will change the peephole right now. If you…..still don’t believe me, you can come to work with me tomorrow.”

He holds my face, not angry at being suspected. His voice is firm: “Or else you can do whatever you want to test me. It was my negligence when ordering food. I just wanted you to try new flavors today. I’m sorry, A-Zhen, I made you uncomfortable.”

He says he is sorry, but I’m the one who is uncomfortable at this time.

I can’t figure it out. I don’t know if there is something wrong with him or if I’m crazy, but now I think that it is most likely the latter.

This makes me very sad.

Mingcheng doesn’t speak empty words. When he’s done talking, he goes to the basement to find the new peephole and comes back. In front of me, he removes the old peephole and replaces it with a new one.

After he’s done, he turns on the yard lights and lets me try out the new peephole.

I lean down, and although the new peephole is a little unclear, I see that the yard outside is brightly lit.

He shows me the old peephole. “It’s dusty on the outside, and it’s really hard to see outside without turning the lights on during the day.”

Having said that, he smiles at me again: “A-Zhen remembered what I said. He remembered to check the outside environment before going out. I’m very glad.”

He is tolerant and generous. Even though he was wronged and questioned for no reason, he doesn’t say anything about it and comforts me.

I cry.

In fact, I rarely cry. All of the tears in my life have fallen in front of Mingcheng.

I cover my face, tears streaming between my fingers. My nose is blocked and my words are a little slurred, but I try my best to say clearly: “I’m sorry.”

I realize that being married to someone like me with a history of mental illness is difficult.

I used to think that my illness would not affect my life. After all, I am optimistic most of the time. I stay up late every day playing with my mobile phone, sleep until I wake up naturally in the morning, and have no cares in the world. I put off my work as much as I can and always go with the flow. Even Dr. Zhao says that my symptoms have been very mild in the past two years, and I should be fine soon as long as I keep taking my medicine.

Mingcheng takes away the hands covering my face, wipes all my tears away, then lowers his head and kisses me.

He pries open my teeth. There is no distance between us, entangled and intimate as we are.

After a long while, his voice comes between our entangled breaths, low and magnetic, as warm as water. “I understand. You care about me so much that it’s difficult for you to ignore anything about me.”

He lowers himself and puts his arms around my thighs, then picks me up and walks toward the bedroom.

I indulge myself in his arms and sniff the cologne on his body. The scent of fringe flowers is elegant and light, relaxing my mind.

I chose a large bed for my bedroom. Laying on it feels like falling into the clouds. 

I lay on the clouds with his arms braced on both sides of my head, his beautiful eyes looking down at me…..

We have a beautiful night.

Later in the night, when I’m sleepy, I hear him say in my ear as he covers me up: “Go out and relax tomorrow.”

Before I fall asleep, I have the vague thought that this is a good idea.

. . . . . . .

I wake up around nine o’clock the next day.

As usual, the sun is shining brightly, there is breakfast in the kitchen, the medication for my mental illness is on a plate, and Mingcheng’s persistent instructions are on the phone.

I feel much better today, so I actively heat up my breakfast and honestly take my medicine after eating. Then, for the first time in a long time, I take out the clothes I like from my closet and feel very comfortable after getting dressed.

Comfortable in both body and mind.

When I go out, I deliberately choose a high-collared shirt and pour a lot of food for my little white bird.

“That bird of yours is just an ungrateful thing and was born to peck people. It was transferred from several homes before it belonged to you, but you’re still keeping it.”

A cold female voice sounds. An extremely tall woman stands outside the courtyard door.

The woman is about the same height as me, a man, with broad shoulders and soft yet strong facial features. She wears a long dress with a mid-length waist and sleeves, and the arms hanging on either side of her look very powerful.

I smile at her: “Mingyi.”

Mingcheng’s sister, Wen Mingyi, is one of my only friends.

I open the courtyard door for her, but she doesn’t come in. Instead, she halfway leans against the wall and raises her chin at me. “I’m very busy at work. What do you want from me?”

Although she has had a bad attitude toward me since she grew up, I still like to tease her. No matter if she is a little girl or has grown up to be a mature 180 cm woman, in my heart, she is still the little sister who couldn’t tie her shoes.

I raise my eyebrows at her: “I want to hang out with you.”

She stares at me and seems stunned for a moment, then gives me a look of disbelief. Although I’m teasing, but her attitude softens quite a bit. “I-I really am busy at work…..”

I wave my hand and say sincerely: “It is still difficult to become a world famous female boxer. You should take a two-day break every now and then to relax your body…..”

Mingyi looks at me with a frown: “What?”

I’m very good at reading faces, and shut my mouth.

The summer in Yuhua is beautiful. This city loves flowers very much, and peonies are planted in the green belts. Driving around from the main road, one can see pink and blue clouds of them, very beautiful. We go to the city’s largest Liuli Sunshine Flower Hall to drink rose wine, go to the theater, and eat unhealthy KFC for lunch.

When Wen Mingyi bites into her chicken burger while wearing a dress worth thousands of yuan, many people look at her in surprise. But she sits in her seat, unfazed.

Time is truly a magician, turning a soft and immature little girl into a calm and mature adult.

She drives me back home in the afternoon and I pat her shoulder, reluctant to leave. “We haven’t gotten together like this for a long time. I’ll try to call Mingcheng next time. We can have a meal together, all right?”

Mingyi had her head lowered, smoking a slender lady’s cigarette. When she hears what I said, she suddenly stops smoking. After a moment, she slowly raises her head and gives me a strange look.

There is surprise among the many emotions in that look, which I don’t understand for the moment.

She frowns at me and says with some hesitation: “…..Are you crazy?”

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Chapter 2 << Table of Contents >> Chapter 4